Hello friends, long time no see.

I have some notes/quotes from Daniel Cardinal DiNardo on July 9, 2012 (Cafe Catholica).

Salvation is the marriage of God and human beings. 


If you can learn to love scripture, you can be confronted.

If you think no one cares, know that the archbishop cares.

3 Challenges of the Church

1. -(Grave Issue) Great falling away of those practicing their faith.
2. - Those in the clergy who are not enthused of the faith and we do not have enough religious.
3. - Hostility towards the Catholic faith.

How will we recover from the consequences of Vatican 2?
- Increased reverence for the Eucharist as the anticipation of the final kingdom.

Advice for sons and daughters who are active in the Church, but their parents are not.

1. - Pray for the parents every day. Never stop praying, Jesus can always rise up at the last minute.
2. - Carefully place a pamphlet of apologetics where they can see it.
3. - Always be forthcoming of your own faith.

On Prayer.

"Rejoice Always. Pray without ceasing." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

Praying in so special that it is our tweet, facebook message, text/call, e-mail, snail mail to our Heavenly Father. As much as we keep touch with our friends on the social networks, God gives us the opportunity to talk to him by praying to him. However, with all these technological ways to contact our friends, we somewhat expect them to respond immediately, or we think that we are being ignored, rejected. When we call on God, it is only on His time that He will respond to us.

Let's go back to the basics.

"Pray" comes from the Latin word "Precari", meaning "to beg".
"Begging" comes from the Latin word "mendicans", (mendicant) - those who rely on charitable donations to survive.

When we pray, we beg for God's mercy, forgiveness and favor on whatever we place at the foot of his cross. At the same time, we CANNOT CHOOSE what we want on our plate. When unfortunate events happen to us, it does not mean that our Lord and Savior allowed it to happen to spite us and make our lives miserable. He knows that it enables us to grow stronger in Him when we are at our lowest, if we let it.

I'm guilty of this too, but I hear people all the time praying for God to DO this or DO that for them. The real question is what are WE doing for the One who created us?

Where is our Faith?

I don't have to be devoted to God to love God.-Anonymous

Today, the gospel was Matthew 13:44-52. Jesus talks about how clear cut the good and the bad are. How our hearts should be yearning for that goodness, so much so that we would give up all our possessions and obsessions to obtain the true treasure. The "good fish" and the "bad fish", the "wheat" and the "weeds". HOW CLEAR CUT IS OUR GOD? He does NOT say, "And the O.K. fish are throw in their own special bucket for the choosing." NO! My brothers and sisters, His judgement is clear. We cannot just live to be O.K., we cannot live through life as just a "good person". God gave us free will to be EXTRAORDINARY. To live out our faith TILL IT HURTS (Mother Theresa).

I have been given the crazy stare down many times. I have been asked Why do you go to church a lot, is something wrong? Yes, my friend, something is wrong. The church is not filled EVERY DAY. We don't praise God EVERY DAY, just only on the special holidays (Easter, Christmas..etc.). CHRIST is just waiting for us to visit him to say hello and we are too busy to care. I would be seriously offended if someone called me their best friend and just visits me on my birthday or when they only need help. Imagine all those heartbreaks that we have faced; I'm sure Christ's heart aches every minute... every second.

But you know is crazy wonderful? That our GOD still loves us even though we're messed up, in the dumps, and have nothing to offer. He loves us when no one else does. He loves us when we think we've been the bad fish all our lives and you think there is no hope. He gives us hope when the world hates us.

Can we love our family and not be devoted to them? Can we love our spouse and not be devoted to him or her? Dictionary.com says that devotion is profound dedication; consecration.
Lastly, can we love our Lord Jesus Christ and not be devoted to Him?

May our roots be planted in the good soil.

#rant #allforGod

The Journey Begins, Again.

Teach me, Lord, your way that I may walk in your truth, single-hearted and revering your name.

Psalm 86:11

This verse strikes a different chord in my heart, once that brings me closer to my calling. Oh, how the Lord has humbled me in so many ways. Reading that verse is SO MUCH EASIER than LIVING the verse. Simply asking, "God, I will drop everything in my life for you, so that Your will may be done" entails a higher level of trust and faith. I am not very sure where I am... in all of that.

I admit, I tend to act on impulse. I make decisions right away, and I slowly but surely convince myself that I have made the right decision. Sometimes, my emotions and feelings would be manifested by listening to my heart instead of logic. In turn, I breakdown and cry over it...never turning to God for his leadership.

The main idea that I have been struggling with is my vocation. What does my God want me to be? And frankly, how does that fit into my "ideal" life? Why am I here on this Earth? Day after day, as I read into Rediscovering Catholicism by Matthew Kelly, I contemplated on the people I want to imitate. I want to be closer with God; with my whole body and soul immersed in His undying love. I want to be a sponge saturated with His Love and that every action of mine is only to glorify Him. I want to imitate the Saints.

Every Saint has a past, Every sinner has a future.
Please pray for me :)

Distraction.

As I sit here brainstorming for my Patho paper, I thought of blogging.

"And I consecrate myself for them, so that they also may be consecrated in the truth"

- Jesus (John 17:19)

"Consider how he endured such opposition from sinners, in order that you may not grow weary and lose heart. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding blood.

(Hebrews 12:3-4)

God had put many trials before me, and I have failed them all. Entrusting Him with my whole life and my whole being is not as simple as the Christian happy-go-lucky movies portray. It is a real battle that must be faced each and every day with the armor of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is up to us to wear his armor, or to go naked.

I, myself, have been going naked for quite some time without realizing it. I have depended on my brothers and sisters in Christ to lead me, when it is actually a vertical relationship between God and myself. It only makes sense, because in the end, it will be just God and myself. I cannot be attached to anything of this world, for it is only temporary. Father God, have mercy on me.

A priest during confession corrected me on a point: There is a difference between struggling with sin and surrendering to sin. Struggling is using everything in your power, as well as the weapons of God (i.e. Bible, Rosary, increased prayer life) to fight and take charge to resist sin and Satan. Surrendering is letting the sin control your life, to devour you, and you fail to move against it because you are tempted. God fights for our attention each and every day, He loves us so dearly and would do anything to have us back in His arms.

Protect your hearts, protect your spirit and open your hearts to Him.

SB

Thought of the Day

These past few weeks have been pretty hectic. School here, family there, homework here, friends there, et cetera. In the midst of it all, I seem to always encounter this problem; Where shall one draw the line in friendship? When I mean "draw the line" I meant the line between being brothers and sisters (for girls and guys respectively) to taking the next level.

In this modern society that we live in, we tend to be surrounded by the product of the media. The media brainwashes children and even older adults to believing that it is impossible to keep a platonic relationship with the opposite sex.

That bothers me. This is where my rant starts.

Where has all the chivalry gone? What happened to being friends first, and trusting that God will send you the right soul mate?

Brothers, stop chasing after us like we stole your wallet. We sisters do not like to be chased around, nor do we appreciate you touching/talking to us inappropriately. I understand that this is not all the brothers, but you guys seriously need to start learning from each other. How can we ever view you as a brother when you cannot respect us as a sister?

Sisters, guard you heart. There are so many guys out there that all look like a nice piece of candy. But some of them will make your tummy and your heart feel ill. Be patient with God and trust Him first. Always strive for purity! You are your own billboard- you attract men by the way you dress, the way you talk, and present yourself. Empty yourself and let God in so that he can fill you with the love that we long for. :)

So how can we keep our relationships with our brothers and sisters pure and friendly? We should all love one another, just as Christ loved us. We should all respect each others personal space, privacy and friendship. We must keep our mind focus on the ONE who created you both, and He will direct your relationship in the right direction.

Fin.
Sarahboo.

A Speaker, Speaks.

Evangelism.

Since Cafe Catholica- no, scratch that.. since I have admitted and practiced my faith this year, I started to see and feel so many opportunities to evangelize.

Ooh! The word that not very many Catholics are quick to do. For 20 years of my life, I have always hidden behind the door, because of my little faith. Marcel LeJeune in Cafe Catholica Houston 2010 told us that as Catholics, we were CONFIRMED and ANOINTED not to be just "labeled" Catholics, but to be a light to others through evangelism.

I don't know what you are thinking, but the idea of evangelism has such a negative connotation these days. I was just talking to two great friends of mine, and they just hate it whenever people come up to them and ask them if they are saved or that they will be going to hell because they are straight up Buddhist. I constantly get ridiculed because they assume that I will do the same thing to them because of my faith. I do not blame them! Did Christ go up to his disciples and told them that they will go to Hell? Or did He lead by example and showed love and compassion to everyone he encountered? Mohammed did make a point (don't quote me):

"I like your Christ, I don't like your Christians."

How can we bring people into the Church if we scare them away? You cannot force anyone out of their free will, so lead by example and love with all your heart, your mind and your soul to our Lord Jesus Christ. "It is not your job to "lead" (them), but to get out of the way (LeJeune)".

I will leave you with a special quote by my lovely sister, Janie:
"Sometimes we are only meant to plant the seed."

Praise be to our Lord Jesus Christ.

Surrender.

Surrender. In order to be the good fruit in the parable of the sower, I need to surrender my life to Christ. That's a pretty bold statement.

Why do I find it so hard to surrender my life to the One who made the heavens and the earth? The One who made me. Why is it that whenever I move my foot one step closer to the Church, that I am moving two steps away from my friends and family. I think that is my issue: selfishness. I cannot move forward with God if I continue to hold onto what I love on this earth. It hurts SO MUCH because I am feeling this bubble. I know where I stand as a daughter, a best friend, or a acquaintance, but now I am not feeling them around me. I am just driving alone in the road looking for God like I am looking for a gasoline station on a dirt road. Emotionally I am so disconnected from this worldly reality that I even question it at times. Why did God try so hard to keep me living from the day of conception? WHY AM I HERE?

I feel that the real struggle is that I am a control freak. I want to take control of my life and make my own rules and have all the attention on me. I seem to lack the precious quality of being humble. At mass a few days ago, the priest explained that longing for God is not a feeling, it is a decision. The emptiness that I feel because I do not have God first or totally in my life must be treated like an chronic illness. Constant nourishment from our Lord, acknowledging our lack of worth and our debt to Our Savior to keep the love and the life going is only scratching the surface of what must face.

So I must face the world and let God take the wheel.

Why is Good Friday, Good?

What really got me yesterday while eavesdropping on a conversation:

'What is Easter?'

As we approach the end of this Lenten season, I think about all the times I have taken Easter for granted. Bunnies, easter egg hunts, chocolate---the media truly had me as a child. I never knew about Good Friday, or the Easter Triduum.

How can we take Jesus's cross for granted by replacing his image with bunnies? I don't understand how the greatest sin of crucifying an innocent man could be replaced with such an image. How could we be so self absorbed to forget the real meaning of Easter?

I dare you and myself to look at a cross, and think differently this Easter.
We die because of our sins, and then are forgiven. Tell me that's not powerful.

Praise God

So I'm pretty ecstatic right now, because God answered my prayers!

Leave all your trouble and worries to God, because he will provide and he will answer. He will set you free from your problems and show you how merciful and how powerful he is. :)

Thank you Emily for the wonderful news. You have made my year!
Say girl, may I have some of that BACON.
Digital hug! (hug)


I love my roomie, Cindy!
Hi my name is Cindy, I'm 20 years old...
I know.. I know... I know...


By the way, studying is great ;)
<3

Wonderful Experience

Hey everyone! I feel anew again!

Confession is the most relaxing and rewarding experience ever.

Better than that ride at Frontier Fiesta.

Haha.

Woo!

I just want to give appreciation to God and praise him here.

I'm so blessed to have Him in my life.

Love God.


I'm so addicted to the CNC, I'm not even joking.

Life is just getting started!

I don't know about you, but I'm feeling great!

Since my last blog, I reflected on those three resolutions that I planned to commit to. I would be glad to say that I have been living up to all three of them.

I just came from the Alternative Spring Break (Galveston, TX) and I feel like a new person. I have the drive to meet new people, and spread a smile wherever I go. Most of all, the service taught me to always turn to God when I have problems and with praises. I know that I would have have been able to go through work this weekend without praying to him right before and after work. He's a miracle maker, I can tell you that.

Right now, the passage in the bible that I'm thinking about is the one that Father Mundy mentioned at mass yesterday. It was about a girl accused for adultery, and the Pharasees were testing Jesus by using Moses' Law. According to Moses, those who commit adultery should be stone to death. Jesus replied by saying that whoever is without sin is the first to throw a stone. The men started walking away, and the only one left was the girl. Jesus didn't throw a stone either, and told her to not sin anymore.

This passage reminds me of the times whenever I was unfair to my friends or acquaintances that I accused because they did something wrong, but only finding fault in myself as well. It sucks, I've lost many friends that way just because I hung out with a crowd that pretty much gossiped. I really want to be friends and mend broken bonds, even though it seems too late. It's really never too late to do God's work, anyway.

I've never been so happy in my entire life.

Praise be to God,

Sarahboo

The New Year, or the "new me"?

I'd like to take this year, like every other year, as a challenge.

Every January, we tend to bring ourselves to start a new beginning by creating a diet to lose weight or to read the bible every single day. And each and every year, there are obstacles that face us and our promises slip away until we revive them for the next new year.

This year will be a different year.
I will be single for the first time in over three years. I will be able to experience this freedom to have crushes and to like someone and not be cooped up inside my turtle shell. This means looking good and feeling great inside and out.

For the new year and the many years to come (as God allows),

1. I will watch what I eat. I'm open to diets, however I know I will not stick to one, so now I will make sure that full does mean full and not hungrier. If I don't finish my food, a tupper-ware will be used to scrape off the leftovers for the next day. I will not waste food by throwing it away.

2. Second, I will exercise. Sampanda and I will have our exercises outside so he can have a great run while I could burn some off some of my cellulite. I figured that I'm not getting any younger and its harder to take the fat out if its been there for a while.

3. I will be nicer to people. I think this is my hardest promise because I am a biased freak-of-nature and I do believe what my friends think, but I will have to widen the horizon.

I think three is good enough.

Thanks Brian Berger for reading, I'm loving the encouragement :)

Confused or blind?

It has been a while since I wrote in here. I feel the need to express my feelings on here so I do not throw the burden at my friends.

These three and a half years have been a difficult road that taught me about myself. I knew that before I met him, I had this unrealistic view of life. Because of him, I learned how to love someone else and how to take care of them. Because of him, I strive to find a clear direction to my passion. And yet, because of him, I expect more of him than myself.

I want to know what love is. I thought I have been loving all this time; taking care of him, trying to help him succeed. But somehow, I'm being pulled down, by his lack of drive and his family. For so long I was able to keep the family separate from our lives together, but as the clock ticks, I had a hard time picturing our lives together with our families not getting along. I cannot picture myself saying, "sorry kids, we cannot visit grandma, she's not a good lady". With someone who has not had a grandma to hug and to touch, how could I isolate my future children? The future of us looks dull and hazy, just like the morning mist of a foggy morning.

Is it fair for me to do this? To judge someone because of their circumstances? Can you call me weak because I cannot look past all the obstacles? Would it be a fair argument to say that I only like me who are stable and I would leave them when they becoming paralyzed and fractured and essentially 'useless'. This is such a controversy that I have to leave up to God. If God wants us together, he would do what it takes to make this work out.

These past lonely nights have been hard. I have spent every day for the past 3 years 8 months talking to a lovely voice on the phone every night, either saying goodnight or praying. Now I have a void that I have to fill with busy work, or I cry.

Let this be a prayer.

Pulling myself back up AGAIN...

Although I did buy a new laminated journal to write my thoughts in, I still return to the same ol' blogger. Typing is the new cursive.

School has toned down just a bit. I'm learning day by day of what I should be reviewing and working hard to make sure that I do not bite myself a few days before the test. I did struggle at my first round of tests, but I will not let that bring down my hope. NEVER!

I do have PPA to keep me sane and to realize that I do have the privelege to meet many different faces across campus. I have learned to be a more approachable person, and to be witty as well. I have not stress too much about the club these last few weeks because I have realized that the stress was just a time waster.

I want to be a pharmacist. I really want to be the person that the patient looks to whenever they are questionable about what they are taking. I need to be the person that has the answers. I cannot be worrying because I should be ready. And I will be.

Dear Lord,

Thanks for all the blessings you have given me. You are such a wonderful God. I know I do not deserve it all. Please let me be the light that you want me to be. I want to be the new light that could shine in other people's lives. I ask you for patience with my family, and perserverance as I make my way through obstacles that Satan brings before me. You are amazing.

Amen.

Heartbroken.

Right now I'm heartbroken. Reality just slapped me on the face. As much as I want to make everyone happy, I surely can't, and I certainly failed as being a girlfriend. I'm not going to go into details, but I am just crushed. I know my time is up. It is over.

I do not know what is wrong with me. I came into this world naive and very open to anyone who would take care of me. I was not matched up during the first half of my life, but now I feel so alone. I feel heartbroken.

Why does that happen Lord? Why do we pour ourselves into a person that we truly think that will be the one for the rest of our lives, but then emotionally run down by problems? Was it because it was not meant to be and You were trying to show me signs to leave the relationship? Or was it more than that? How about if you were trying to get to me using the man that I love? I used that word wisely for a reason Lord. Strike my tongue so I may not speak it.

As much as I want him to be happy, and as much as I want to be happy, I know both cannot happen simultaneously. Either he is happy, or I'm happy. Seperated of course. Together, I don't know. I don't know if he was happy to be with me.

Why is everything falling apart now Lord. I'm being tested emotionally and it hurts. I gave my heart and I suppose it rusted. It got too old. I feel miserable Lord.

Dear God,

I have not been a very good daughter or a very good girlfriend lately. Snapping at my parents and my boyfriend for no reason has done me no good. I have turned into this monster, throwing anything and everything without conscience. I feel like I have not done your will all week or all my life. I know my character is not naturally like this, but Lord, why is it like this?

Why do I lash out in anger, or ignore wise sayings?
Why do I beat myself up over school when I know that in the end there is only the ones I love.
Why do I not make my boyfriend happy whenever he does his best to make me happy.
Why am I not the same person I was?

Lord, I feel like I have lost myself. I have lost my character, my kindness, my culture. I have just recently told him that I could not talk to him for a while because my poor attitude is diffusing into his character- which is one of the last things I was to do to a person. I rather corrupt myself and punish myself only for my problems rather than spread them to the ones I love.

Lord, I repent of my sins and the sorrow I have caused. I hope to be a better daughter, a better girlfriend and a better friend right now, because I am unaware if I will be alive tomorrow. I pray to be a better person and to be a shining influence in all the lives I touch.

I pray for mercy, forgiveness, love, wisdom and understanding. I love your grace lifting me up whenever I am in the car and listening to song that talk so great about you. I love singing and praising you. I thank you for all you have done for me; giving me this house to live in, wonderful parents, a great boyfriend, and friends that all stick by me thick and thin. I thank you for every breathe I take, every move I make, and every decision that I can make because these are all things that I take for granted Lord, and I pray to be the best child I can be.

Amen.

Dear God...

Dear God,

I had experienced many emotions this week. I was falsely scared and sad, and I was truely scared and sad. The way I felt during each situation all rooted from a happy moment. I have always wondered if happiness and negative feelings should be in equilibrium. Because lately, they have.

This week I though my friend was dead. I was scared. Knowing that in any moment someone can say their last words in an instant. As dumbfounded as I was, as shocked as my body was, I dropped my books and prayed. Turns out this friend trick many of us by pretending to be dead. Death and emotions are definitely not subjects anyone should joke about.

I found out that my dancing buddy at St. Lukes passed away a few weeks ago. He was in his 50s. What was so striking about his death was that he looked perfectly healthy, always had a happy face and was never tardy in his attitude or in his work. He was a joyful man. Although I didn't get to spend time with him for that long, I'm proud that I knew him. He is a happy man, who dance with me with the radio songs, in front of the pharmacy counter. I hope you are doing okay up there Mr. Richard.

And now today, I was at the gasoline station and I saw two people fighting. I couldn't quite eavesdrop during the quarrel, but I saw that the man had a gun, and the woman had a small pocket knife. The woman called the police, and I did too. I was frightened, for the woman and for all the people in the gasoline station. The guy had a pistol and could easily ruin lives who were simply at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Thank you for all your protection, your love, and the safety you give us Lord.
I hope everyone will be safe this summer, and come back in one piece.
Amen.

Running out of gas.

It is safe to say that I am not the only crazy person who is running crazy from ridiculous gas prices. Seems like everywhere I go now, the easiest way to pull up a conversation is by complaining about gas prices, rather than "where do you work, or where do you go to school".

So my life has been pretty hectic lately. I'm working every week, going to school for 4/7 days for 4 hours straight in the evening, searching for spare change to fill my gas take to half a gallon so that I'd never go empty, and of course volunteering.

I have been getting complaints about people not being able to hang out with me or being boring by sleeping instead of hanging out, and I'm sorry. I actually enjoy keeping myself busy. I do not like the old ideas of boring and unaccomplish summers and I plan to achieve half or all of my list of things to do before fall begins.

I want to thank all my friends who have stuck with me through and through, and the new ones that seem like they will never fade. I pray that all of you have plenty of blessings now and as your life continues.

Pump that.