Right now I'm heartbroken. Reality just slapped me on the face. As much as I want to make everyone happy, I surely can't, and I certainly failed as being a girlfriend. I'm not going to go into details, but I am just crushed. I know my time is up. It is over.
I do not know what is wrong with me. I came into this world naive and very open to anyone who would take care of me. I was not matched up during the first half of my life, but now I feel so alone. I feel heartbroken.
Why does that happen Lord? Why do we pour ourselves into a person that we truly think that will be the one for the rest of our lives, but then emotionally run down by problems? Was it because it was not meant to be and You were trying to show me signs to leave the relationship? Or was it more than that? How about if you were trying to get to me using the man that I love? I used that word wisely for a reason Lord. Strike my tongue so I may not speak it.
As much as I want him to be happy, and as much as I want to be happy, I know both cannot happen simultaneously. Either he is happy, or I'm happy. Seperated of course. Together, I don't know. I don't know if he was happy to be with me.
Why is everything falling apart now Lord. I'm being tested emotionally and it hurts. I gave my heart and I suppose it rusted. It got too old. I feel miserable Lord.
